Relationships

New Reviews: “Avoidant”

Avoidant: How to Love (or Leave) a Dismissive Partner

Avoidant: How to Love (or Leave) a Dismissive Partner

Avoidant: How to Love (or Leave) a Dismissive Partner keeps reaching new people. The latest reviews on Amazon:

John C.
5.0 out of 5 stars
Study this book, and begin to see everything more clearly.
September 21, 2019
Verified Purchase

Once I heard a little bit about this concept, I went down a rabbit hole of research- starting with this book. Necessary information for folks who want to be liberated from the oppressive feeling of being loved less than you deserve.. and getting back less from your partner, than you are consistently giving to them. This info was a light for me, when I was lost in darkness and frustration over behavior that NO other definition can accurately explain. Attachment avoidant.. I had never heard of it, but now I see it as easily as I can see skin color, height or weight. Getting the knowledge was liberating and empowering- and this book was my first step towards healing and moving forward, happier.

Jeremy Q Wilbanks
5.0 out of 5 stars
Great Read?
08-31-19

For anyone looking to understand themselves better as well as the closet people in their lives from an attachment standpoint this is the book for you. The author does a great job explaining concepts and ideas. It helped me a ton as I broke up with my dismissive-avoidant partner. I can now see how we co-mingled for so many years. I can finally move forward opening myself up to a more secure attachment style.
Buy this book, trust me totally worth it! No 🧠 er

I’m 40 and I’m stuck in a long-distance relationship with a dismissive guy…

Email today from a 40 year old reader who recognizes her hoped-for partner, who’s never let her get to know his friends and family, is dismissive-avoidant and she needs to move on. She knows she has to, but it’s hard. My response:

The other book is the first and was aimed at younger people who are looking around. There’s some material Avoidant doesn’t have but it’s probably not worth your time.

Your bf is literally a check-all-the-boxes classic case, not mean like some but not really there for you in bad times.

It’s healthy for you to look away from this or any other relationship for a while and concentrate on yourself and the moment and place you are in. The partner you want wants the you that is happy by herself, who brings her own strengths he can lean on when he needs to.

You have the bird-in-the-hand issue — he has many positive qualities, you like his company, why drop him for the possibility you’ll find someone who’s more fulfilling for you? It is always up to you, but you’ve never been close to him for long enough to see the emptiness of the long run together.

40 is NOT TOO LATE. There are many good quality men coming out of bad first marriages. There is a very good chance that if you start spending your energy on yourself and not this guy, a much more fulfilling partner will turn up at some activity you’re involved with.

Best of luck!


[Note: if you arrived here looking for insight into a dismissive or fearful-avoidant spouse or lover, read: Avoidant: How to Love (or Leave) a Dismissive Partner.]


More on Attachment and Personality Types:

What Attachment Type Are You?
Type: Secure
Type: Anxious-Preoccupied
Type: Dismissive-Avoidant
Type: Fearful-Avoidant (aka Anxious-Avoidant)
Avoidant: Emotions Repressed Beneath Conscious Level
Serial Monogamy: the Fearful-Avoidant Do It Faster
Anxious-Preoccupied: Stuck on the Dismissive?
Anxious-Preoccupied / Dismissive-Avoidant Couples: the Silent Treatment
nxious-Preoccupied: Clingy and Insecure Relationship Example
Domestic Violence: Ray and Janay Rice
Malignant Narcissists
Teaching Narcissists to Activate Empathy
Histrionic Personality: Seductive, Dramatic, Theatrical
Life Is Unfair! The Great Chain of Dysfunction Ends With You.
Love Songs of the Secure Attachment Type
On Addiction and the Urge to Rescue
Sale! Sale! Sale! – “Bad Boyfriends” for Kindle, $2.99
Controlling Your Inner Critic: Subpersonalities
“Big Bang Theory” — Aspergers and Emotional/Social Intelligence
Porn Addiction and NoFAP
Introverts in Management

“Avoidant” – 135th Review. “Loved it.”

Avoidant: How to Love (or Leave) a Dismissive Partner

Avoidant: How to Love (or Leave) a Dismissive Partner

Avoidant: How to Love (or Leave) a Dismissive Partner keeps reaching new people. The latest review on Amazon:


S***** S
5.0 out of 5 stars.
Don’t judge a book by the title
May 13, 2019
Format: Paperback
Verified Purchase

Originally I was reluctant to read this book because the title, however after reading more about it was actually about I decided to get it. AND LOVED IT. This book can be a difficult read if you are being brutally honest with yourself about your own faults and those around you. But if you’re reading it to gain a better understanding about attachment and for personal development, it’s the perfect book to get started. I’ve recommended it to many others since reading. It will be on my list of top 10 personal development books. Highly recommend reading.

“Avoidant” Audiobook Reviews

The audiobook sells as many copies as either print or ebook, but the reviews from Audible don’t appear in Amazon. I noticed some new ones:

5 out of 5 stars
Anna, 11-17-18
Eye Opener!

Excellent book for those in relationships with Avoidant types. I’ve read it three times in the last 4 days. Now I understand the relationship that has confused me for two years. Empowering information. Highly recommended.

5 out of 5 stars
Ruzette Nicolas, 11-06-18
excellent

despite it was not my first book on attachment. I really found it interesting and useful for me and for my practice as a psychologist

5 out of 5 stars
Anonymous User, 10-04-18
Amazing book

This is an amazing book, not only for comfort to make you feel less “crazy” about your relationship but to also give you pointers on how to work with your self and your partner.

5 out of 5 stars
Autumn Roth, 09-23-18
A life changer !! A must read for ANYONE partnered

Without this book, I would have lost my husband and Home, and would have continued on the aimless path, seeking out the “jerks”

I am still married to the “jerk” but with this book, I was able to take “me” out of the equation, to see that it was with empathy and understanding he wasn’t trying to hurt me, he was just so hurt as a child, he didn’t really learn HOW to be empathic and closely bonded… once I took this info to heart, we both are much happier since he learned my needs as well…. it saved my marriage, home, and happier than ever!!! The way it’s written and dictated, it’s very clear and spot on!

5 out of 5 stars
Anonymous User, 09-13-18
Helpful

This book was very enlightening and gave clarity to a lot of things I’ve experienced with my partner. If you think you may be with a dismissive avoidant partner I would highly recommend this book as it gives understanding to your partner’s attachment style, how your style may interact with theirs, and some strategies on how to deal with it. Good read.

5 out of 5 stars
Cynthia Lally, 05-21-18
necessary for anyone living with an avoidant

absolutely eye-opening! Thank you for the much-needed insight and guidance. the author is a gift to his profession.

Ah, shucks! I’m just happy that lots of people find the book helps them.